My old boss from my old job called me and invited me to a candle party today.  I went out of respect for her, as I DO respect her greatly, even though she is no longer a boss/co-worker, but now simply a friend.

Her two daughters  (25 and 44 yoa) were at this gathering, and after the rest of the guests left, Marcy(former boss) asked that I consider being quasi adopted to their family.  Tears rolled down her cheeks when she recalled to me as she came to my own Mother's funeral, and said that I still needed a mother figure of some sort.  That as the yougest in my family, it was unfair to be statured as the matriarch of my family now, without some support system of my own.  She said she respected me and how I was able to follow my mothers final wishes and not allow others to sway me .

Her two daughters welcomed me into the fold and I appreciate that they view me as sister, however, I wonder if this is a need on their part for a strength I have that this family does not posess?  

My famly is about as difunctional as it gets. Two siblings have been in prison.  There are only 3 out of the 7 of us that have no criminal records at all.

I guess my question is this.  I may be too close to the situation to have clear feelings on this.   If anyone's intuition is screaming please let me know.  I truely enjoyed the time I spent with thm today and I felt honored by the Marcy's offer to welcome me as an adopted daughter.  

Just is an odd situation for me.  Any insight or  intuitions would be helpful.

If you feel happy, honored and grateful for her offering, I don't see any reasons why not accept it. Trust your guts.

After all, IF things turn to the worse, there is no shame in following a path they aren't accompaning you. You can ALWAYS "change your mind".

Consider also that Gandhi, Nelson Mandela and Leonard Peltier all have a criminal record and have been in prison... it's not always a sign of dysfunctionality Nevertheless, I think you chose that family for a reason, so in my mind your birth family's dysfunctionalities (we all have them, you know), relations, mechanisms and systems doesn't have much to do with whether you are to extend your immediate family or not. I would accept these ladies' generous offer and embrace the possibility

Good luck to all of you

Hugs,
Ket

Hi EarthMother,

I completely agree with Ketutar. If it feels right to you, there is no reason not to enjoy the fruits that this family is willing to share with you. My thoughts are that you should sit down and ask them why....and then ask yourself the same question...I don't think there is anything to lose by this proposition.

They are not asking you to join a cult or drink any tainted kool-aid...are they? LOL

I think you did the right thing by asking an outsiders opinion tho. I would have done the same thing. If Marcy cares about you and you feel comfortable....well why not go for it? And enjoy life....

I agree as well....if your not uncomfortable, and maybe it would give this woman some good feelings, could be win win and yup, you could always change your mind...you never know, she could have hidden wisdom for you  good luck whatever your decision, Blessings, Lavendar-Ice

This is indeed a life decision, and I'm sure that it is ne that has presented itself for a reason.

Take a few to think on it. Listen to what you gut (your inner self) and your heart (your divine connection) is telling you. Neither feeling will steer you wrong.