I say call Fox Television and point them to this thread.....

All I can say is you can't make up stuff like this!

I think all will be well in the end....just some ole'goats buttin heads over who is in control....at least that's the image I get....

Hope I didn't offend anyone... I apologize if I did.

Things have gotten a little better concerning the wedding.  Part of it also maybe that I have decided to just do our part and make sure what we are doing is done and done correctly.  Whatever her family has agreed to do is up to them.  The girl is spending less and less time with them and more with us.  No problem there really except again she is trying to separate him from the family but tells him she isn't.  I mean I understand her wanting to spend more time with him but she knew coming in that were a tight knit bunch and there are only five of us including her.  My mom has a heart condition and the boy lives right across the street so he looks in on her every day.  We all usually have supper together as there doesn't seem to be much sense ion everyone doing a small supper for each.  When they start having kids things will be different because face it no old lady wants to be having supper with yelling kids all of the time. *LOL*  but all in all things are getting better.  She gets on my nerves some but hey I am no angel myself so I am trying not to be pushy.  though her step brother got himself in a WHOLE lot of trouble two weeks ago and her mom and step dad did not call the boy ( who is a lawyer) to help them out. So the 14 year old kid is now in juvie.  Her mother's answer as to why they didn't call was that they were afraind that the boy would call the wedding off and drop the girl.  Now of course that went over like a lead balloon.  Why would any mother allow their child to be in a loveless marriage, which to my mind would be what it was if the kid would throw her aside for something she has no control over.  Just when it settles down they do stupid crap like that.  Yes we do not care for them but still how would that make the boy look.  If he ever wanted to ever do anything politically he would have to represent the step-brother.  For our families appearance sake alone if nothing else.  The first words out of the step-dads mouth is we got no money.  I am so sick of hearing that.  Man I would beg, borrow and steal to have my kid looked after.  Anyways  last minute stuff needs to still be taken care of.  Mom still has dresses to make and she is stressing over that.  I cannot wait until it is all over and done with.  *LOL*  then of course the next drama will take place. hehehehehe.  Kid has his kilt though and most of his regalia just a few little things left to get.  Maybe I will take a few pictures and see if I can upload them so you can all see him in his kilt.

You guys are what is keeping me sane.  I may not be posting much right now but hopefully after all of this is done then I will get back to it.

Love and Laughter
~Raveness~

Glad to here things have stabilized a bit for you (although the feeling I get is that you're just way beyond frazzled by it all and just want it over with). As far as her wanting to monopolize more of your son's time than you're used to: Just be patient with her. If her home life (prior to becoming involved with your son) was everything you've described, your son, aka: the love of her life  is the one thing she doesn't want to have to share with anyone. I don't think she's intentionally trying to come between the close relationship your son has with you or your family. The vibe I get (for now) is that she's just happy and (for the time being) just wants to enjoy the bond that appears to be strengthening between her and your son. Have faith in the bond you have with your son. Know that that can never be broken. I think this phase will definitely pass. Sounds like she just needs to feel secure about where she fits into your son's life. I think she just wants to feel like she is HIS WIFE  rather than YOUR DAUGHTER IN LAW. Kinda like needs to feel like she is the most important person in his life (or at least as important to him as you are ). I think she just needs to gain some confidence in herself and the strength of their relationship. I think everything will be ok though. The key is patience As a loving parent you'll always want to keep a watchful eye on your kids and nothing will ever change that. Just use binoculars for now and do it from a little greater distance  

Blessed Be

Draco

LOL you are of course right. Hubby says the same thing.  He says when we were married we wanted to be alone. :roll:  oh well I am trying.     I cannot wait until the wedding is over though then we will all be FREE!!!!!!  She is trying and I do try to acknowledge that.  I guess I can't understand how she is allowing herelf to be stuck in the hard place she is.  I am just an independant pushy old witch. *LOL*  Fiercly protective.  I did tell her yesterday though that it won't be long and then she is ours.   And then I told her as she could see from the sruff we have collected once we get something we seldom let loose of it.  I think she kind of appreciated that.  I realize that I scare her a bit.  I have dusted off the spotting scope and binoculars.   even dusted off the pendulum for when they are out of sight.   Thing is she gets a little defensive about going to dinners and stuff with him (that was always my job)  but I have told her time and again my feelings aren't hurt and that as his future wife she has to get used to going to these things.  I don't think she really believes it though.  One rule our fa,ily has that she is having a hard timew with is the calling, we insist that if one is going on a trip or what we call over the hill we insist that someone at home is called and told that they got there alright. especially in the winter time.  Once they are at the destination we don't want to be called everyfew minutes.  Just you got there and that you are leaving to come home.  Time counts as you know if you are in an accident. She says her mother never insisted on them letting anyone know they just went and did thier thing.  Okay it may look like we are controlling but hey.  oh well only about 2 more weeks. hehehehehehe.

Love and Laughter
~Raveness~

Ravenss, I dont' think the calling thing is controlling at all. In fact, I do that with my oldest son all the time. I also tell him to call me and let me know if he is leaving the original place where he was supposed to be. I think it shows that as parents, we do care about their safety and well being. And after reading all of your posts, it sound to me like, your future daughter-in-law got very little of the caring part. I think that if she's sincere about the love she has for your son, then eventually she will come around and do the right thing concerning her "parents". If that's what you want to call them. Looks to me like their biggest concern in losing their meal ticket and dear old "Daddy Dearest" might actually have to get a job and support his family......

Just my .02

I fully understand your wanting your son to advise you of his safe arrival to/from any destination. I do the same thing for my daughter when she drives anywhere (she's only 17 and been driving less than a year). As a parent, you can't help but worry about your kids. However, the cord has to be cut my dear. Will it stop you from constantly worrying about their safety? Absolutely not. There are times when I can hardly contain myself- pacing the floors because my baby is not standing in front of me where I KNOW she is safe. But at the same time, I know I have to let her spread her wings and fly a bit so she can learn how to deal with the world and all its pitfalls, and experience first hand the beautiful things as well. It takes a lot to let go, but you have to do just that to allow them to grow. Have faith that the Lord & Lady are watching over them. Have faith in the loving relationship you share with your son-that he'll always remain close. We won't be here forever dear. Nobody knows what fate has in store for us. Life is precious. Its also comes with no guarantees. My only real fear is not being there for my kids when they need me. But I also know I'll rest a lot easier if I know they can survive on their own when I'm gone. Its SO difficult letting go at times. All we can really do as parents is be there for them if they stumble and help them get up again. As far as the step brother thing, I wouldn't be too concerned about that. If the kid's family doesn't wish to utilize your son's abilities that's their problem. Frankly, as disfunctional as that family sounds, detachment sounds like the better option anyway. It may be your son's guardian angel looking out for his better interest Just some food for thought my dear. Hope all is well.

Blessings,

Draco

LOL  I understand all of the comments.  And I think I will feel less threatened and more able to relax once they are married and she is out from under the influence up there.  It must be really bad cause the kid doesn't even want to go up there to get her clothes.  She is washing the one set of work clothes she has and the one pair of jeans she has.  She is wearing the boys tee-shirts.  My mom told her that I would go with her to get her clothes if she wants back up.  I will tell her also.  Now they are saying they want pictures of the bride and groom before the wedding, but not together.  there are two picture takers and so one will take the grooms stuff before the wedding and the other the brides.  The wedding is at 3 and they want them to get dressed at noon so they can take pictures.  Now that is riduculas.  The dinner doesn't start until 5 so I feel we had left plenty of time from the church till then to take pictures and you know what if it runs longer then dinner is late.  The girls dress just fits her and to be in it all trussed up that long is tortureous and it is white so you can guess how long it would be before it wasn't.  Besides no one is supossed to see the bride until she comes down the aisle.  The girl doesn't wear heels that often and I think her wonderful day wouldn't be so wonderful if she has to be in heels from noon to about 9 at night.  So my mom is calling her mom and the fight is on again. *sigh*  only one more week.  Actually I think my mom is going to be bluntly snotty this time.  She is telling them that she is paying for the majority of the wedding so it is going to be her way.  They went off yesterday and had a day together then they came over to our house for a bbq.  It was pretty good.  I think she will fit in.  he is our only one though so it is hard. *LOL  I am trying to be better though.

Love and Laughter
~Raveness~

Your doing just fine Raveness. Thats pretty bad when the poor girl doesn't even want to go get her own clothes .She's probably affraid they'll corner her and try to squeeze more money out of her. Being dressed BY noon sounds a little bit early, but not by too much. You'd be very surprised at how fast those 2-2 1/2 hrs will fly by before you have to leave to arrive at the church by 3:00. The dinner is at 5:00. The ceremony I assume will last at least 30 - 45 mins. then there's them thanking all of the people for attending as they leave the church. depending on how many people are at the church, that can take at least 20 mins. Factor in travel time from the church to the reception and that doesn't leave a lot of time for picture taking between the church and the reception my dear.The day is gonna absolutely fly by. Everyone is gonna be exhausted at the end of it all . If the photographers are the ones who are requesting the times to be ready by, its probably a good idea to do as they requested. If they're any good at their job, they have a pretty good idea on how long it takes to get enough photos for the happy couple to choose from for their wedding alblum. Just a thought my dear. Good luck  
Please wish them well from me.

Blessings,

Draco

Well the girl went and got her clothes.  She is now unofficially living at the boys house. Sleeping in the spare room. *S*  Only three more days until the big event.  I am ready to still kill.  We have officially taken over now.  It is as I said only three more days and the girls family has yet to step up to the plate.  So we had better not hear how we pushed anyone out of the way and took over. *S*  My mother is making the brides maid dresses and it is very stressful to her not knowing what is being done.  So she is calling and venting to me and of course being the good wife I am I am venting to hubby and to you guys. *LOL*  I keep telling myself just three more days.  Then the gloves are off. hehehehehehehe.  Hubby has spent a little time wiht her and she likes him a lot. *LOL*  She talks to him I guess and she thinks she is the best listener.  I don't have the heart to tell her he doesn't pay attention.  He just adds the appropriate uhhuh and yup. We have been married 28 years so I guess I have him trained well. ROTFLMAO.  He isn't stressing cause he knows we will get it done.  My brother is coming on thursday so we will get his family to help set up the hall and get my sister-in-law to cut the cake and stuff like that.  Oh so much fun.  Okay I will go for now but will let you all know how it goes.  May have to come on and do a major vent friday or thursday night.  Maybe in jail Saturday night.     kid may have to bail me out if they step out of line   Hopefully I won't have to call down dragons on their butts.  That could be messy.  Though I know my Dad will be there (he passed in 2007)  and he could cause all kind of havoc if he so desires.  he slapped my Mom in the back of the head the other day while she was sewing.  She had the sewing machine threaded wrong. :|   Okay I feel better now.  Thanks for being there guys it is mnuch appreciated.

Love and Laughter
~Raveness~

You know Lady Elaine I would be laughing my butt off if I read this if it wasn't really happening to me.  You have not offended me. *LOL*  I think that is a great picture.  But can we say and old cow butting heads with a (okay insert the most retarded animal you can think of here.)   (argue)
It is almost surrea;. haha

Love and Laughter
~Raveness~

I can picture it!  

Best of luck to you Raveness  and especially to the happy couple . Let us know how everything goes. I'd be especially interested in hearing about how your Dad deals with the girl's family (sounds like he's still got some spunk ). Personally, I'd still have some dragons on standby just because ...  

Blessings,

Draco

Well the deed is done.  They are now married.  The ceramony was great and I didn't have to kill anyone. :roll:   Lamost did though at the rehersal.  I mean talk about rude.    I had to tell them that there was no food or drink allowed in the church. and I had a melt down when the photographers(if you can call them that)  wanted to go up on the alter to take pictures because they couldn't get a full on face from the aisle.  Give me a break.  I mean okay I am now no longer(haven't been for over 30 years) a practicing catholic but I still respect other religions holy or sacred spaces.  I mean the church still practices rituals that came from Pagan sourses.  Anyways.  every time the one lady kept flashing pictures I got madder and madder.  It was like the flash bulb was just pushing my buttons.  You know like an epelictic(spelling) has seizures from flashing lights.  I just lost it and had to leave the church.  The priest came out 5 minutes later and talked to me and I told him there was no res;ect involved.  I even had to tell them they had to remove their hats in the church.  Give me a break.  anyways he said he would make it all work.  Now in theold days there used to be a rail on the alter kind of like a place to say you can't go beyondd this point.  Some of the churchs still have them some don't.  Anyways when I was little htere was a rail and no one but the priest and his alter boys were allowed beyond that.  Not even womn.  These kept going up there.  I told them not beyond the rail.  They thought I was retarded.  So them the priest ended up giving the whole lot of them a 45 minute lecture and lesson on the Catholic church and the meanings of the statues, the stained glass windows and the stations of the cross.  *LOL   I must of been a sight cause as I look back at it i kind of compare it to the monty python movies where everyone is bunched in a corner afraid of the crazy person in the room.     On the wedding day itself I was running around back and forth from the church to my mom's house trying to get everything ready.  I was in my sweats and a tee-shirt.  If one more person had asked me if I was wearing that I would have killed them.  Sad part was that we got no pictures ourselves.  we were so busy that we didn't have a chance.  And in the wedding pictures there was only two that had us in it.  One with my hubby and the kids and then one more with my mom and my brother and his kids.  That was all they took of us.  Oh well.  Her sister took some which I nabbed and then I know the kids will get some so I can get one or two that way.  I am not interested in any of her family.   The ceramony itself was wonderful.  The boy looked handsome in his highland regalia, kilt and all and the bride was absolutly beautiful in her gown.  I kept it together mostly but broke a little when we gave her the boys plaid and welcomed her into the clan.  The boy had a full knights of columbus honor guard, swords and all.  It will be the talk of the town for years to come.  My brother rang the church bells for a full five minutes for them.  The reception dinner was nice.  My mom made a subtle jab by telling her mom, brother nad sister that she was going to be loved  and they didn't have to worry about her.  She was ours now and we would take care of her.  No mention of her step-dad or his family   She was very upset that her mother did not bring a picture of her dad to the hall like she was supposed to.  We almost left dad at the church.  Okay here is a little explaination of that.  My dad has been dead now for two years. *S*  but he is still around us in spirit.  He actually does things so we know he is there.  My mom said he hit her in the back of the head when she was sewing the dresses and she had the machine threaded wrong.  Dad liked to look after d=sewing machines and tinker.  hehehehehe.  We had a single red rose floating in a vase to represent dad.  Roses were his favorite flower.  So everyone looked at us strange when we talked about dad being there.  We put him at the head table on the grooms side.  We went home and got a picture of the bride and her dad and by the time we were back they had the head table broke down but we found a place for the brides dad and put our dad there also.  they would have gotten along great.  The bride and her sister croke down and bawled for about 10 minutes.  dinner was great.  The party after sucked.  The brides brother was in charge of the music and he had none.  The whole thing was over at around 8pm.  we wentrinto the bathroom to get her out of her gown cause it was sqeezing her to death and when we came out eveyonme had gone.  She had no one to throw her bougquet to or anything.  Oh well she is having a good time now.  There were dragons galore at the whole party.  maybe that is why the wanted to leave so soon(otherside).  Okay I have rambled on long enough for now.  I will get back to you guys later.  After you have read the book.  ROTFLMAO!!!!

Love and Laughter
~Raveness~

This reads like a great comedy, Raveness!  I can truly appreciate the humor of much of the "family" since I'm so close to the situation!    Gotta love N. Idaho.  :roll:

I'm glad it's over and you can breathe a sigh of relief now.  Whew!  The bride is very lucky to have joined your family and I'm sure she will appreciate it once she is totally "away" from the old one...

Congrats Raveness! Its all done and you now have a beautiful new addition to your family. Best of luck to the new bride and groom

Blessings,

Draco