Fun With Language

GRAMMAR RULES!

[If you get the joke, you've got the rule.]

*Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read.

*No sentence fragments.

*It behooves us to avoid archaisms.

Also, avoid awkward or affected alliteration.

Don't use no double negatives.

If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times: Resist hyperbole.

Avoid commas, that are not necessary.

Verbs has to agree with their subjects.

Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.

Writing carefully, dangling participles should not be used.

Kill all exclamation points! ! !

Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

Take the bull by the hand, and don't mix metaphors.

Don't verb nouns.

Never, ever use repetitive redundancies.

Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague.


[If any of these are too hard, just ignore them for a few years.

Read it again every once in a while and see if you get any more of them.]

This is SO cute....and timely!  My favorite is "Proofread carefully to see if you any words out."

I tend to do that alot....

I was discussing grammer with Battery the other night....and how so many people do not use it, or even speak correctly...mumbles are prevalent down here in the Deep South....I can't understand what some of these folks say....and when I say "excuse me" they look at me like I am a crazy-person! What is it about mumbling down here?????

For as long as I've lived here you'd think I could answer that! LOL Yet I went to visit family all over this country so have been blessed with the ablity to understand and pick up    much of the different accents people have. An my father demand that we (when growing up) spoke with  proper english. Yet the mumble isn't one!!

Enjoy!!!

LOL, I like it!

Apparently, I know my English well enough to understand (and laugh) at all of those. Laughing not necessarily at the statement itself, but because I know SO many people who don't seem to realize those rules exist.