This is so weird...I've been worrying for the past few days about something probably really ridiculous that involves relationships, and, as I was considering posting my thoughts on here, I accidentally clicked on the relationship thread and thought, "Heck, why not?" With the new internet explorer, I'm always opening links on accident because the scroll on the mouse has now become an "open new window" button...

Anywho, All I can ask before I post this is please don't judge me...I know I'm young and possibly very stupid, but I am ready to stand up and take responsibility for any consequences my actions have led up to...

I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half now, and we were abstinent for the first year and two months...but things have changed in our relationship...we decided to become physically intimate because we share everything else anyway...we know each other inside and out, share similar interests, backgrounds, and opinions and love each other more than anything. When we first met, I saved him from a drug addiction and he saved me from suicide...and we've been together ever since...

Well, now that I have the background covered...I'll fastforward to the present...

James and I were "together" about a week after my period, and 5 days later...I had some really light bleeding that I thought was a really early period (I don't normally keep up with it unless I have to...and then I figure the dates based on what I was doing at the time)...but it only lasted an hour...I didn't think anything of it. Then, about a week and a half later, my bra size went up a whole cup and, a like a few times in the past week, yesterday, I felt like I was going to puke, out of the blue, for no reason...

I didn't even think I could be pregnant because we used protection...but then, as I was going to the bathroom for the fourth time in two hours, I got to thinking...the condom we used, the wrapper had popped when someone sat on the wallet it was in...James and I didn't hit the finish line that day, but there's still a slight possibility...

Am I worrying over nothing?

yeah, I'm hoping I will get a chance to buy one tomorrow. The only reason I stress about it is because I'm on several medications that could cause some serious problems to an unborn baby...

I honestly didn't even think it was possible until someone joked about it when I got back from the bathroom during my first hour class...and already had to go again. And then my OCD mind got to racing...

All James has to say is, "You probably aren't, but if you are, so what?" *big smile on his face* "We can take care of it."

Yes, indeed the mind can play tricks on us, follow Alora's advice, get a test done. You have a wonderful partner, and I am sure "IF" you are pregnant, you will both have to make one of the most serious decisions of your life.

Would you like to be pregnant?

Well, I don't really want to be but if I am I'll be okay with it...

I took a test, it was negative. That was a week ago. According to "professionals" it was still a little early to know. I still haven't gotten my period, but I'm not stressing about it. I won't let myself really worry about it at all unless I don't have it by the tenth...then I'm testing again.

When I was young (er) we had free clinics that could do a blood test, I don�t know if they have them around you or if they even still have them around me. But that would give you and answer, if you are worried about your meds.

But the worst thing you can do is worry over something you can not change. So take it one day at a time kid.

Good news! I'm not pregnant! Just a teenage body changing into a woman...and it sucks because now I don't fit anything that I like either because of my boobs or my butt... ... And James says I have no reason to complain about that...

If I seem kinda perky, it's cuz today is my birthday and I FINALLY got my official license (and my mom's check).

Just for the record, I haven't abandoned this site...I just haven't had time to get on the computer at home and I'll get in huge trouble if I get on a message board at school...

Thanks. Well, I was supposed to get a social security check but when I told my mom that I wanted to split the bills rather than give her all the money, she got really mad at me and called social security and somehow got it back.