Hello Everyone,

Here's what I want to do:

I want to send energy to my ex boyfriend, and the father of my daughter, to help him get motivated. He has lost his job, and is depressed.
I am trying to help him find a job by contacting people I know who may be able to help him. But, he has to have the motivation to get up and do it. He is a good person, he's just fallen into the habit of laying around and feeling sorry for himself. Also I'm sure there's a touch of freakin' laziness in there too!!! He has a wife and two kids with her, as well as one child with me. He NEEDS to get a job and help support his family!!!

He knows this, and is a good man. He just needs a push!

I know you can't help someone who isn't willing to help themselves. But, I thought there may be something I can do to nudge him in the right direction. Which I think is to be motivated to get a good job, and provide for his family. Take pride in being able to support his kids and have nice things. This would naturally help his depression too.

Anyone have any ideas, or advice? I don't want to tell him I'm doing this, which may be an ethical problem. But I think it would offend him if I told him I was doing a spell to help him not be LAZY.... ha ha

And, I want everyone to know that I understand that depression is a disease, and not laziness at all.

But, I have known this man for years... and I do believe that some of his problems at least are just because he needs to get up off his ass and go to work....

Thank you,

LJ

Thank You CoyoteMoom for your replies. I agree that spells from the heart do work best. I do have good intentions and only want what would be best for everyone in this situation, I believe.
It's frustrating to watch someone self destruct, and not want to improve themselves. Especially when there are other people besides themselves that it effects.

I'm sorry for not introducing myself first. I really did not mean to be rude. I didn't even think about doing that first.
Do I just need to go to the Introductions thread and post some things about me.. ?

I will do that ASAP.

Thanks again,

LJ

Thank you Bear and CoyoteMoon. I deeply appreciate the encouragement you both have given me.

I also really appreciate your thoughtful insight, Bear. I do try to be respectful of his space.. and YES he has disappointed me beyond words. Basically broken me inside, so that I will never be the same person ever again, is more like it. But, anyway.... that's another story. You seem quite in tune if you could read into that in these few short paragraphs.

I just want to help him take a step in a positive direction for his own good. Which in turn will be for the good of his family.

I am going to write my own spell, and ritual to perform. I will definitely let you know what I come up with, and how it goes. It feels nice to have a place to share this experience..

I can't tell you how grateful I am for that!

Blessings...

LJ

Thank you CoyoteMoon. I do hope that my children can learn from my examples, as well as from my mistakes.

I certainly would hope to send them into adulthood wiser than I was when I started out.

I know they will make their own mistakes, and discoveries in this life. That is normal.

I just wish I could spare them the pain of making mistakes that will haunt them for the rest of their lives like I have.

But, all I can do is try, and be there for them when they fall.

As for this current situation... I understand what you mean about not being able to control others. I just wish there was something that could be done, that would help motivate him.

I sense that he is a good man, with loads and loads of potential and good intentions. He's smart, and charismatic. He had an abysmal childhood filled with neglect and physical abuse. But is very kind and loving to his own children. He says he never wants his kids to suffer the way he did.

He could do whaterver he wants to in life. But, he is like water in that he chooses the path of least resistance every time. I just KNOW that somewhere deep inside of him there is a part of him that can do better.

Am I just wishful thinking? Or am I really feeling something legitimate?

Maybe it's just me. I personally take pride in having a good job and moving up in my field. Making more money etc. But, he will work a job for six months to a year and find another one and have to start over on the pay scale.
If he get's laid off, he'll sign up for as long as he can before finding another job, and readily admits he's lazy. So, maybe I should just give up and accept that he is the way he is.